90 seconds on reality

So I am stepping out slowly but surely to the reality. Back to school and back to work and all that.

Somewhere I read that we only hold emotions for 90 seconds… then they blow over.

So if we can only survive those 90 seconds – not responding with another terrorizing emotion or action – we will be grounded back to life again. Which of these lives now – that is…

So I am stepping out slowly but surely to the reality. Back to school and back to work and all that.

Somewhere I read that we only hold emotions for 90 seconds… then they blow over.

So if we can only survive those 90 seconds – not responding with another terrorizing emotion or action – we will be grounded back to life again. Which of these lives now – that is…

I found that I am either conditioned, or shaped, into believing that emotions are good – that is what life is about in fact. The bigger the better. There are 2 backsides to this reasoning however.

One being I only seem to be big on the negative stuff and can barely separate the difference or define the positive ones…

The second is society seem to prefer we are not emotional at all. It is disturbing apparently.

And then the given that once we finally get that we are more than just this body and just this life – then there is the children…and they didn’t ask for neither the way kids don’t.

Is functioning the same as being numbed off and in survival mode? Denying pains, grief and regrets?

Getting stuck in one owns pains or of others is simply overwhelming. To be eye to eye with real suffering is hard. Rape, war, money disasters, death…just to name a few that landed in my inbox this Monday morning. It feels  like one could throw up, call in sick and go and hide under a pillow – but that is not an option in my reality. I can dwell in the 90 seconds and that’s it.

Resourcefulness means something else here. One way or the other you have to move yourself forward. Plant the seeds. Nurture and nurture and nurture again and if everything goes well harvest at some point. Nurturing can also be hard. Children, animals, work, self, family…

So I hold that breath for 90 seconds. Sit in it all and when i let it go I am so out of breath I can’t take another one fast enough – and whatever moment has passed and I can re-focus.

Going home. 299 signals to go.

Image courtesy to Coward Lion at www.fredigitalphotos.net

 

 

 

Gratitude de luxe

I think I first heard about gratitude journaling on Oprah. Sounded a bit too hunky dory and don’t-they-have-anything-else-to-think-about? So naturally I kept too busy to do it…

I think I first heard about gratitude journaling on Oprah. Sounded a bit too hunky dory and don’t-they-have-anything-else-to-think-about? So naturally I kept too busy to do it.

Second wave came with The Secret books. I actually did the exercises, but again it didn’t really stayed with me. Start-stop-syndrome.

Third time was with Rhonda Britten – she advocates taking it a bit deeper than just listing things, to actually write out the whole scenario or scenery in such a way, that if you look back into your journals years from now, you should be able to recall the exact memory.

This did help a bit. I stayed on it for ca 10 months – 5 every day.

Then I read the book by T Harv Eker and doubled it to 10.

Yet it started to feel random again.

Then something didn’t happen and I couldn’t write how grateful I was about it as I had planned.

Somewhere along the lines of understanding myself and understanding co-dependency patterns it does have sank in that controlling out comes is a less good habit. As well as things happen when we are ready, universe has our back etc.

So for whatever reason I started to write the good things it was or could be that this thing hadn’t happen. And then it worked. It just came bubbling up and I almost over-whelmed myself with emotion.

It not just worked for deepening gratitude, but it also turned negative thinking and expectations into something positive, so positive in fact I could dwell in the feeling of good rather than bad.

That was a first and I liked it. Maybe it will get old too one day, but for now it does the job very well.

Do you have any De Luxe versions of gratitude yourself? Please share with me 🙂

316 signals to go. Good steps.

Image courtesy to Thank You1 at www.freedigitalphotos.net